The Kind Men of Mankind

Hey Girl - Boyfriend MaterialI owe Moe an apology.

I wrote and told him that I had joined MeetUp to find groups of people with common interests (not to find a date), and I explained that I was uncomfortable meeting one-on-one with a complete stranger. Instead of responding in anger like most guys in my past experience, Moe replied in a kind, respectful fashion:

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I know that a lot of my posts have sarcastic, cutting humor at the expense of the men I meet, and that’s probably due to the season of life that I’m in, but that’s no excuse for poking fun at genuinely good guys who happen to catch me at a time where I generally despise all of mankind… emphasis on “man”. But the kind men of mankind deserve my respect, admiration, and kindness in turn.

I don’t think it’s true what they say – that nice guys finish last. Admittedly, good guys like John and Moe have failed to win my affection, but correlation does not guarantee causation. In other words, their “nice guy”-ness was not the reason that I wasn’t interested. If I could be physically attracted to Moe or emotionally connected to John, I would happily consider dating them. They seem like good men who truly want to love a woman well. But chemistry and attraction are not things that I can control, and I am too much of a romantic to imagine marrying someone I don’t love and respect

Truth be told, there have been few men in the history of my existence – nice guys or not – to whom I have been physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally attracted. Are my expectations too high? I would rather be single than settle. I am not under the illusion that anyone is perfect or even perfect for me; I acknowledge that marriage is the union of two sinful people who are trying to cohabitate in a broken world. But I have to hold out hope that God has uniquely created someone with whom I will share mutual respect, admiration and love. And, to be clear, I genuinely hope that he is one of the “nice guys” – one of the kind men of mankind – because those are the men who know what it means to truly cherish the woman they love.

Authentically Aurora

1 thought on “The Kind Men of Mankind

  1. Kind men are awesome, aren’t they? Thank goodness for the kindness of men. When it comes to romance however, I suspect a whole lot of us really do nix the good guys. It’s not that women like jerks, but we do tend to like men who can hold their own. I noticed that about myself long ago, the smart part of my brain thought it should be attracted to the good guys, but the rest of me went in the other direction. Ultimately I got very lucky and married just the right combination.


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