5 Things NOT to say to the Sister of the Groom

Annoyed bridesmaidThese are things people actually said to me at my brother’s wedding this weekend. My dad always tells me that I need to lower my expectations of humanity. I don’t know why I’m always surprised by the audacity of people – you’d think I’d have learned by now.

5. “Did you bring a date?”

Do you see a date, punk? Use your eyes, not your mouth.

4. “Hi, we’ve never met before. I’m Doug.”

Actually, Doug, you were my youth pastor for all four years of high school. Glad I was such a memorable kid.

3. “Who was that guy you were just talking to? It seemed like you were really hitting it off. Wedding bells soon?”

Over-eager Aunt Gertrude, I know you are desperate to see me married off. And I appreciate your enthusiasm. Actually I don’t. The single men here are all barely out of college. Please stop asking me about every baby-faced child you see me talking to and assuming he is my future husband.  

2. “Can you imagine how much sex your brother is having right now?!”

That is absolutely crass and classless, you tasteless buffoon. Also, that is a mental picture I could have gone without, thanks.

1. “Weren’t you supposed to get married earlier this year?”

Yes, Uncle Mike. Like I told you at your daughter’s graduation and again at Thanksgiving, my fiancé proposed in January and got cold feet in March. Thanks for having me re-live that on a monthly basis in front of large groups of gawking relatives.

On the plus side, I totally rocked my duet with Jack. I can’t control others, but I can control myself, so when I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.

Authentically Aurora

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6 thoughts on “5 Things NOT to say to the Sister of the Groom

  1. I think your dad is right. I heard on the Today show that the key to happiness is low expectations. Though this was from the Today show. Soo…anyways, I think the lower the expectations, the less bitterness. Maybe that is why I am so bitter. Because I have actual expectations of people.

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    • Lol – silly us, having actual expectations of people!

      My older brother (not the one getting married) told me yesterday, “You know, you really are a natural leader, although not in the way most people would define leadership. You inspire and elevate everyone around you to be better versions of themselves. And that is true leadership.”

      Coming from an Army Special Forces guy, that meant a lot. I suppose part of the reason I lead through influence is because of those expectations I have of people – higher expectations than they have for themselves – which is the reason they get inspired, and I get bitter. Ha.

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      • That is quite a compliment from your brother! I think there is definitely a type of leadership that isn’t an in your face type that most people consider one.
        I think that is pretty much the way an introvert does lead. They never want the title or the burden of leading or the mantle, but more they want to inspire and guide. I think a lot of the great prophets were probable introverts, Moses, Elijah, Enoch for instance that just wanted to be good, but were called by God to be more. Thank goodness Moses had Aaron to do the talking for him.
        I’m guessing Moses got pretty bitter dealing with all those Israelites all the time.

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        • I never thought about Bitter Moses before, but I like it. It makes me feel slightly better about my frustration with people.

          Exodus 16:20 – “Moses was very angry with them” (for hoarding manna).
          Exodus 17:4 – “What should I do with these people?” (when they complained about lack of water)
          Exodus 32:19 – “Moses saw the calf and the dancing, and he burned with anger. He threw the stone tablets to the ground, smashing them at the foot of the mountain. He took the calf they had made and burned it. Then he ground it into powder, threw it into the water, and forced the people to drink it.”

          I’d forgotten how epic-ly awesome Moses was.

          Liked by 1 person

        • I’m sure if it wasn’t for his conversations with the Lord and Aaron and a few others, he would have had quite a frustrating life. Those people he was dealing with complete nincompoops. (Though to give them a little credit, they had been slaves for a long time and weren’t used to thinking for themselves.)

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