The Dater’s Dilemma

Sweet Home Alabama trioHave you ever seen the movie “Sweet Home Alabama”? It follows Reese Witherspoon as she tries to decide between two men:

  • Andrew Hennings, the suave, wealthy son of the mayor of NYC (who, by the way, proposes to her at Tiffany’s and tells her to pick out any ring she wants!), and
  • Jake Perry, a good ol’ Alabama boy with a fun-loving, playful sense of humor who drives a pickup truck and sports rugged good looks.

If you haven’t seen the movie, I won’t spoil it for you, but suffice it to say that Reese really struggles because she loves her life in New York, working as a fashion designer and living the high life, but then she goes home to Alabama surrounded by old friends and family and says, “This fits, too.” Both men are equally wonderful in their own ways. And she has a decision to make.

In the past week, I have realized that I am living my own version of “Sweet Home Alabama”. If you’ve been following my blog, you know that I unexpectedly uncovered an indescribable connection and chemistry with Flynn on a camping trip a couple of weeks back. And you also know that I recently (and equally unexpectedly) found myself being courted by Bryan, the intriguing and wealthy gentleman who took me out for ice cream in his Aston Martin.

Jake PerryFlynn is a good ol’ Louisiana boy with a thick Southern drawl and a black pickup truck. He’s a 34-year-old mechanical engineer and former Army Ranger who plays acoustic guitar and has a rugged, roguish charm about him. He’s a bible study leader at church, and he makes me laugh constantly (throw-your-head-back kind of laughter). But he has a girlfriend.

Andrew HenningsBryan is an independently wealthy, 36-year-old electrical engineer who is a practicing Christian with a dream of opening an orphanage in Haiti. He is cultured and intelligent; laid-back and adventurous. I enjoy his company, but I wonder if our attraction is purely intellectual, without any emotional element to the connection. He also doesn’t see himself staying in one place for long, so life with Bryan would be one of perpetual instability.

So what’s a girl to do? Allow Bryan to continue courting me to see if sparks develop? Pray for Flynn to become available? Cut them both loose? Decisions, decisions…

Fun fact: I met Bryan at Flynn’s Thanksgiving potluck for their church group. Yes, they know each other and have several mutual friends. Isn’t life full of interesting twists?!

Authentically Aurora

5 thoughts on “The Dater’s Dilemma

  1. If this “Flynn” is trying to approach you, while he still has a girlfriend, what would make you think he would not do the same, if you were his girlfriend, or later perhaps even his wife?

    It is important to share values with your mate, if you want a long lasting and happy union. If you would not approach a guy while engaged in a relationship with a nother, then you do not share core values with someone who would approach a nother girl, what ever his reasons to do so. It does not matter wether you are the members of the same sect of religion, happen to like the same literature, movies, hobbies, or what ever. The core values are revealed in what you really do, not what you think is good, bad, or even important. Equal trust, in my experience is the most valuable possession shared by life mates. That is, if you are seeking for one.

    Do not take my word for it, but think about it. 🙂


      • Well, I was affraid I might come out as patronizing. Now I feel relieved, you did not see it that way. 🙂

        I have every confidence in your ability to see what I meant by yourself. Certainly I do not think of myself as very wise in any human relations issues. Your post just reminded me of some experiences I have had. That is, that too often we are much too close to stuff, issues and especially people, so that we are not able to see the entire situation clearly.

        Liked by 1 person

        • “Too often we are much too close to stuff, issues and especially people, so that we are not able to see the entire situation clearly.”

          Yes, I have fallen into this trap before, which is why I now have a select group of friends and confidantes with whom I share my heart. They are my accountability partners, and they help to provide me with wisdom to see behind my situation when I am unable to see clearly.

          I am glad you were willing to share your thoughts despite a fear of coming off as patronizing!


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