Bachelor Bash – Week 2

We’re only two weeks in, and already Bachelor Chris and his harem contestants have given us countless cringe-worthy quotes, producing simultaneous amusement and disgust in viewers everywhere. Here are the Top 10 Bachelor quotes so far this season!

#10 – Ashley S. [creepily hunched over a pomegranate]: “I feel so powerful right now.”

Ashley S Onion

#9 – Jordan: “Jillian has the hairiest butt I’ve ever seen. It’s hairier than some of my ex-boyfriends’.”

Jordan hairy

#8 – Lacy (former Bachelorette): “We’re 80/40 on the [wedding] date.”

Lacy 80 40

#7 – Megan: “The butterflies in my stomach are just… colorful and smiling!”

Megan butterflies

#6 – Whitney: “Do y’all inseminate pigs on your farm? We kind of do the same thing! I’m a fertility nurse!”

Whitney insemination

#5 – Kaitlyn: “Sometimes when I tell a joke, it makes people laugh.”

Kaitlyn joke

#4 – Amber: “My heart literally pumps every time I see one of those little white envelopes.”

Amber literally

#3 – Bachelor Chris: “I wish I was a polygamist right now.”

Chris polygamist

#2 – Kaitlyn: “You can plow the **** out of my field any day.”

Kaitlyn plow

#1 – MacKenzie [to the virginal Ashley I.]: “Guys like taking your virginity… I’m so jealous. I can’t even use that because I have a kid.”

MacKenzie virgin

#facepalm. Just… #facepalm.

Authentically Aurora

5 thoughts on “Bachelor Bash – Week 2

  1. Sometimes when I make people laugh, I like to make people laugh. Oh wait…uh…My daughter and I like to make fun of serious or famous sayings and twist them around. My favorite is a quote from Batman. Original: “It’s not who you are, but what you do that defines you.” Our version of course in low Batman voice, “It’s not who you are, but who you are that defines you.” We crack each other up.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thanks for keeping us up-to-date on all of that information and from sparing me from watching it. Who do you want to win…not win (it doesn’t seem like winning when you have to be with a guy like him) but who seems the best?


      • Yes, she does seem nice! Forget about my earlier comment. I’m sure you saw the post and the bet that I lost. So now I’m watching the show! How exciting! Luckily, my friend spared me from watching the “pregame” (it kind of felt like that) or red-carpet. Ugh…it’s actually not as bad as I thought.


  3. Pingback: One Year Blogiversary | Authentically Aurora

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